Archive for the ‘Soccer’ Category

Champs League Round of 16…..A Wild Night in London

Posted: March 15, 2012 by centennialsports in Soccer

Don't threaten old Winston with a glass of scotch.....or a stirring comeback

By Matt Parker

Italians haven’t witnessed an English comeback like this since the early 1940s.

After the Rossoneri escaped the Emirates by a hair from their carefully plucked brows, Fat Frank and the Blues completed one fit for Winston Churchill with their thrilling 5-4 aggregate win in extra time.

The high-powered Napoli trident of Hamsik, Cavani, and Lavezzi were largely held in check as a resurgent Didier Drogba and co. ignited an electric night in West London.

Chelsea was able to overturn a 3-1 first leg deficit into a wild celebration at Stamford Bridge. (Just make sure John Terry stays away from the WAG’s at the pub). What’s even stranger is that the old guard of Ashley Cole, Lampard, and Terry were the best players on the pitch. WTF?

Apparently Andre Villas-Boas sucks. Or maybe they didn’t like playing for a dude who looks younger, slimmer, and smarter. I’m calling player hater. Silky Johnson would be jealous.

How else can you explain them turning it around so quickly after AVB’s exit? It’s incredible. After just one win in their last seven under the Portuguese tactician they have won three in a row. I wonder how much Roman Abramovich regrets wasting all that cash on him. Then again,who cares. That patchy-bearded asshole is so rich he buys a new yacht every time one gets wet.

In the northern end of London Town, the Gunners put one hell of a scare into the red half of Milan. A seemingly insurmountable 4-goal, first-leg advantage was cut to one by half. Laurent Koscielny, Tomas Rosicky, and(surprise, surprise) Robin van Persie had the Emirates rocking after the first 45. Chances came in abundance, but Arsenal would tire after the hour mark, and the Italians successfully parked the bus the rest of the way.


Rosicky of all people has been the catalyst of Arsenal’s renaissance.Van Persie is unquestionably the player of the year, but it’s been the drive through the middle(giggity) that has made the difference.

Maybe I'll sign in Cyprus next year?

So I guess the best they can hope for this year is third place. Maybe that will be enough to convince Van Persie to stay? Maybe they will buy big this summer? Maybe they will be able to keep a promising young team together for a few years? Maybe I’ll be drinking banana daiquiris with Avon Barksdale on St. Patty’s Day?

APOEL made the quarter-finals. A team from Cyprus. I guess that’s pretty good for Cyprus, but honestly when has anyone ever given a sh*t about Cyprus? I’m not about to start. Sorry Cyprus.

Hey Inter, you suck.

That is all.

Editor’s note- The author’s view of the wonderful country of Cyprus does not reflect all those associated with the Sports Provocateur……we hear Cyprus is lovely and we give a lot of sh*t’s about you.